Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
