Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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