Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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