Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
