No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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