Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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