i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
