I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
