This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Randomize
