Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
