I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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