and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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