all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
