You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
