how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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