i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
