soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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