Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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