I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
