dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
