38 yer olds are good kisserssss
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
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