She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Randomize
