Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
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