i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
