its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
