Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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