So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize
