69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
