oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
