He kissed a someone with a penis
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize
