Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
My pussy is not your playground.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
