1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
