Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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