im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
