Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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