She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
