you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize