But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
