You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
