got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I have aggressive nipples.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
