not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
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I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
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the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
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