sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
