we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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