are you still at the devil's house?
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
