Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize