i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Randomize