After last night, I could never be a politician.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize