I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
