So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
