WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
