Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
