u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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