She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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